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A hedgehog's dilemma (revisited)
Nov. 28th, 2005 10:00 amI believe I’ve written about this once before, but I feel the need to revisit it again. Recently, I had an interesting conversation with a good friend of mine. We got on the subject of my habit of “tagging” people. I like to try to tag people with nicknames, some commonplace and some of my own creation. “Italian Stallion” would be an example of a commonplace nickname. “Da Noise” would be an example of one of my own creations.
Calling people by their regular name gets boring for me.
My friend challenged me to tag her. Now trying to come up with a nickname on the spot for someone is rather difficult. But a flash of insight came to me. I decided to tag her with the name of Miss Hedgehog. She liked it, although she wondered why I would call her that. It was from something she told me about once, about how easy it was to feel alone on a campus full of one’s friends.
That thought reminded me of the Hedgehog’s Dilemma (yes, this is taken from the anime Neon Genesis Evangelion).
You see, hedgehogs are rather curious creatures in terms of what nature has given them to defend themselves. They have spikes to allow them to survive their brushes against danger. Their spikes ward them from harm as they curl into a protective ball. But those same spikes which keep their enemies out also prevent their friends from getting too close to them. That is because a hedgehog must be willing to endure quite a bit of pain to interact with other hedgehogs. If a hedgehog avoids pain, then it cannot truly be part of the community and will feel lonely. The dilemma is whether or not the hedgehog wants to avoid pain or avoid loneliness.
Much like a hedgehog, we all wear emotional armor to protect ourselves from harm. We cannot bare our souls to the world, for we would be crushed. But, every so often, we have to let our guard down. Otherwise, our emotions would explode on us. But it’s a scary thing to put your heart in someone else’s hands. Will they crush it or will they lift it up? You can never be quite sure. That’s the risk, but the reward is that you will have created a bond. Some bonds are stronger than others to be sure. In my culture, family is considered to be the strongest bond.
We all hope and pray some day that we find the one person to share our deepest and darkest secrets with. Yet that is a hedgehog’s greatest dilemma: If it shares its deepest pains with another, it must be willing to be gashed deeply itself.
I’ve heard marriage is something like that.
Not that I would know, of course.
Calling people by their regular name gets boring for me.
My friend challenged me to tag her. Now trying to come up with a nickname on the spot for someone is rather difficult. But a flash of insight came to me. I decided to tag her with the name of Miss Hedgehog. She liked it, although she wondered why I would call her that. It was from something she told me about once, about how easy it was to feel alone on a campus full of one’s friends.
That thought reminded me of the Hedgehog’s Dilemma (yes, this is taken from the anime Neon Genesis Evangelion).
You see, hedgehogs are rather curious creatures in terms of what nature has given them to defend themselves. They have spikes to allow them to survive their brushes against danger. Their spikes ward them from harm as they curl into a protective ball. But those same spikes which keep their enemies out also prevent their friends from getting too close to them. That is because a hedgehog must be willing to endure quite a bit of pain to interact with other hedgehogs. If a hedgehog avoids pain, then it cannot truly be part of the community and will feel lonely. The dilemma is whether or not the hedgehog wants to avoid pain or avoid loneliness.
Much like a hedgehog, we all wear emotional armor to protect ourselves from harm. We cannot bare our souls to the world, for we would be crushed. But, every so often, we have to let our guard down. Otherwise, our emotions would explode on us. But it’s a scary thing to put your heart in someone else’s hands. Will they crush it or will they lift it up? You can never be quite sure. That’s the risk, but the reward is that you will have created a bond. Some bonds are stronger than others to be sure. In my culture, family is considered to be the strongest bond.
We all hope and pray some day that we find the one person to share our deepest and darkest secrets with. Yet that is a hedgehog’s greatest dilemma: If it shares its deepest pains with another, it must be willing to be gashed deeply itself.
I’ve heard marriage is something like that.
Not that I would know, of course.
